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Chinese Traditional Wrestling (Shuai Jiao) Week 2 in Review

In Uncategorized on August 29, 2013 at 3:30 am

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By Antonio Graceffo

I just finished my first two-week intensive training in Chinese traditional wrestling, in Beijing, and am headed back to Shanghai. In my second week of wrestling, I completed 12 training sessions. My final day was comprised of two hours strength, conditioning and basics, in the morning and about two and a half hours wrestling in the afternoon. I literally have no idea how many rounds I wrestled. But traditional wrestling rounds are short. You wrestle till someone gets the takedown. Most rounds tend to last about a minute or two, or even less. They kept changing the opponent every three or four rounds, by the end, I was completely exhausted. Every day,  week, my schedule included strength training in the mornings. Then, I either did strength training again in the afternoon, or four days a week, the old Sifus would come watch us do competitive sparring. There was a lot of pressure to perform in those sparring matches, because the Sifus were watching and would clap if you had a good win and occasionally, get up and beat you with a wrestling belt if you did something stupid.

I did a lot of stupid stuff and got beat with a belt. “Thank you, Da Ye, may I have another?”

In the first several days of sparring, I relied largely on freestyle wrestling techniques I had learned in MMA, such as body lock, double underhooks, grabbing one or both of the opponent’s legs, taking neck or back control… On the final day, I forced myself to grab the opponent’s jacket, instead of using my body locking and head grabbing. Next, I used a lot of the new techniques from both traditional wrestling and Shaolin Temple San Da grappling. In one of the bouts, the opponent tried to defend the take down by wrapping his foot around the inside of my thigh, something I learned in Shaolin San Da, as a takedown defense. Because of the Shaolin training, I knew how to simply step around his locked foot and complete the throw. Another time, when I had done a leg-pick, but couldn’t get the opponent down, I trapped his leg between my thighs and rotated my body, till he fell. In Shaolin Chin Na training, I learned two throws from the headlock position. I never thought that would come up, but in traditional wrestling, my opponent grabbed my belt, at the small of my back, and I suddenly found myself in almost the same position as I would be in a headlock throw. I simply pressed down on his closest knee and he went flying, face first, into the mat.

Thanks, Shaolin Temple, for teaching me these surprisingly useful skills!

I am confident that many of these techniques will eventually transfer over to MMA. But, I have to continue practicing the basic exercises for several more months, so I will have the basic strength, flexibility, and balance to do the techniques correctly. After that, I want to experiment, doing them on an unwilling opponent, who is not wearing a wrestling jacket.

I am so sold on the basic exercises that when my training brothers try to teach me a new throw, I refuse to learn it, till AFTER I have learned the accompanying exercise. And if I can’t do the exercise correctly, I tell them to wait a few weeks before teaching me the throw.

With this Chinese wrestling, I don’t even want to guess at how to use a technique till after I have practiced the associated exercise a million times. I saw it when. I wrestled my Se Ge, older brother, for the first time. He has been with Sifu for countless years and is one year older than me, so I have to pay him respect. In the first round, when he swept me, I felt the incredible strength of his legs from years of doing the basic exercises. His legs were like rigid, iron poles, with no give to them. Legs that powerful can sweep you down or lift you up in the air, no matter how much you resist.

There is zero doubt that I am infinitely stronger than Se Ge, and also in better condition for any other form of wrestling. BUT, if we talk about the exact strength necessary to do those exact techniques, he is incredibly powerful and my strength is laughable.

In the second round, however, I leaned on him, held him, mauled him, and wore him down. Several of my training brothers had worked with me on jacket grabbing techniques that approximated body locks that I am used to, so I could just lean all my weight on the opponent, and break him down. All of these guys smoke and drink, don’t run or cross train, and ONLY have strength for the exact movements they practice. Also, I am the only one who trains twice a day, every day. I wore him down, then swept him. He hit the canvass hard and didn’t get up for a long time. Once again, poor conditioning made him take the sweep a lot worse than if he were in shape. He looked like he needed a paramedic, and didn’t train for the rest of the day.

Although Se Ge has good technique and is strong in the specific muscle groups, he never completes a day’s training. He usually wrestles a few rounds, wins, and then goes out for a smoke. This is another point I have about the Chinese athletes. I am in my late forties and training to compete. If I stick with the training, I am sure I could be a good competitor. For the Chinese guys, although they keep the technique and strength, even into their sixties and seventies, they are so unfit, they don’t normally compete or train.

The techniques of Chinese traditional wrestling are wonderful, and I want to learn them. That being said, I don’t know why these guys refuse to be healthy and strong, or why that wouldn’t be a benefit for them.

After I wrestled Se Ge, they put in young guy, after young guy, round after round. Eventually, I was too tired to even defend myself anymore. I lost both of the final two rounds of sparring quickly and in the most humiliating fashion. But I know from MMA training, those final rounds of wrestling are the most important. That’s why in MMA, we always exhaust ourselves before starting sparring.

Now, I will train basics, alone, in Shanghai for a week and then return to Beijing to continue.

Brooklyn Monk, Antonio Graceffo is a martial arts and adventure author living in Asia. He is the author of the books, “Warrior Odyssey’ and “The Monk from Brooklyn.” He is also the host of the web TV show, “Martial Arts Odyssey,” which traces his ongoing journey through Asia, learning martial arts in various countries.

Warrior Odyssey, the book chronicling Antonio Graceffo’s first six years in Asia is available at amazon.com. The book contains stories about the war in Burma and the Shan State Army. The book is available at http://www.blackbeltmag.com/warrior_odyssey

See Antonio’s Destinations video series and find out about his column on  http://www.blackbeltmag.com

website

www.speakingadventure.com

Twitter

http://twitter.com/Brooklynmonk

facebook

Brooklyn Monk fan page

Brooklyn Monk on YOUTUBE

http://www.youtube.com/user/brooklynmonk1

Brooklyn Monk in 3D

Order the download at http://3dguy.tv/brooklyn-monk-in-3d/

Brooklyn Monk in Asia Podcast (anti-travel humor)

http://brooklynmonk.podomatic.com

Brooklyn Monk in Asia Podcast (anti-travel humor)

http://brooklynmonk.podomatic.com

shaolin, wrestling,shuai,jiao,china,beijing,traditional,grappling,san,da,chin,na,temple,henan,beijing,graceffo,antonio,brooklyn,monk,martial,arts,odyssey

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Strength Training at Shaolin Temple

In Uncategorized on August 26, 2013 at 3:22 am

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At Shaolin Temple, with Brooklyn Monk, Antonio Graceffo, training san da (Chinese kick boxing) every day the san da fighters had an intensive strength workout, lasting nearly 70% of their total training day of 6 hours. Antonio received a visit from fellow American and Shanghai University of Sport San Da fighters, AJ Richardi.

Watch: Strength Training at Shaolin Temple

http://youtu.be/2_GiJiSZGoE

 

Brooklyn Monk, Antonio Graceffo is a martial arts and adventure author living in Asia. He is the author of the books, “Warrior Odyssey’ and “The Monk from Brooklyn.” He is also the host of the web TV show, “Martial Arts Odyssey,” which traces his ongoing journey through Asia, learning martial arts in various countries.

Warrior Odyssey, the book chronicling Antonio Graceffo’s first six years in Asia is available at amazon.com. The book contains stories about the war in Burma and the Shan State Army. The book is available at http://www.blackbeltmag.com/warrior_odyssey

See Antonio’s Destinations video series and find out about his column on  http://www.blackbeltmag.com

Email Antonio

Antonio@speakingadventure.com

website

www.speakingadventure.com

Twitter

http://twitter.com/Brooklynmonk

facebook

Brooklyn Monk fan page

Brooklyn Monk on YOUTUBE

http://www.youtube.com/user/brooklynmonk1

 

Brooklyn Monk in 3D

Order the download at http://3dguy.tv/brooklyn-monk-in-3d/

Brooklyn Monk in Asia Podcast (anti-travel humor)

http://brooklynmonk.podomatic.com

Brooklyn Monk in Asia Podcast (anti-travel humor)

http://brooklynmonk.podomatic.com

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What is Chinese Traditional Wrestling (Shuai Jiao)

In Uncategorized on August 24, 2013 at 12:24 pm

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By Antonio Graceffo

After two weeks of living in the traditional wrestling school in Beijing, studying full time, this is my take on what is Chinese wrestling. Obviously, over the next three years of my study and exploration of China’s ethnic wrestling forms, my opinions about and understanding of the arts will hopefully become deeper. But here is a quick intro for the folks at home

Chinese wrestling is a competition to throw the opponent to the floor. If you throw him and remain standing, you get 2 points. If you throw him and land on him, you get 1 point. Each fight has five rounds. And the winner is the one with the highest score at the end. The wrestlers wear padded jackets and much of the style is based on the basic techniques of grabbing and pulling the jacket. The thing I find really interesting about the throwing, however, is that, unlike judo or modern wrestling, the throws are largely not done by using upper body strength, but by very unique sweeping techniques. By modifying the grip from jacket to head, shoulder or triceps, many of the throws could be used in MMA. The reason why I believe this training will help me for MMA is that these throws and the throwing mechanisms are things not normally seen in MMA. Fighters are not trained to anticipate them or to counter them.

As far as I can understand, it is legal to grab the legs, but not so common. It also seems to be uncommon to lift the opponent of the ground and throw him. When I spar, I often use these two methods, which the Chinese wrestlers don’t expect. But I am trying to force myself to learn and use the proper techniques.

The strength and flexibility for the throws comes from doing a series of exercises, countless thousands of times, each day. I see that some of these exercises are the same as top judo players use. One of my tertiary goals this year, once school starts, is to begin learning judo. So, I hope these exercises will help me prepare.

Brooklyn Monk, Antonio Graceffo is a martial arts and adventure author living in Asia. He is the author of the books, “Warrior Odyssey’ and “The Monk from Brooklyn.” He is also the host of the web TV show, “Martial Arts Odyssey,” which traces his ongoing journey through Asia, learning martial arts in various countries. He is also a mixed martial arts fighter who often seeks to find ancient or ethnic martial arts which could lend techniques to modern MMA. Graceffo works as a university lecturer in Shanghai, where he is writing a doctoral dissertation on forms of ethnic wrestling in China.

Warrior Odyssey, the book chronicling Antonio Graceffo’s first six years in Asia is available at amazon.com. The book contains stories about the war in Burma and the Shan State Army. The book is available at http://www.blackbeltmag.com/warrior_odyssey

See Antonio’s Destinations video series and find out about his column on  http://www.blackbeltmag.com

website

www.speakingadventure.com

Twitter

http://twitter.com/Brooklynmonk

facebook

Brooklyn Monk fan page

Brooklyn Monk on YOUTUBE

http://www.youtube.com/user/brooklynmonk1

Brooklyn Monk in Asia Podcast (anti-travel humor)

http://brooklynmonk.podomatic.com

Brooklyn Monk in Asia Podcast (anti-travel humor)

http://brooklynmonk.podomatic.com

 

 

I’m No Hemingway

In Uncategorized on August 23, 2013 at 11:29 pm

 

By Antonio Graceffo

Excerpt from my upcoming memoirs, “I’m No Hemingway”. “After drinking such an incredible quantity of other people’s liquor, a normal man would be unable to stand. But I stood, as my father had taught me, in the center of the horse track on race day, not caring if she looked at me or just drank more gin with Scott and Zelda. The old Indian, who carried my gun on hunting safari, spoke to me about fishing, in Spanish. But all of this, like women, was a mere distractions. The important thing was to be a man, a man’s-man’s man. And to this end I was holding a sword fish, while waiting my turn to step into the boxing ring.”

I believe I may have read too much Hemingway, also, most of this never happened to me.

Brooklyn Monk, Antonio Graceffo is a martial arts and adventure author living in Asia. He is the author of the books, “Warrior Odyssey’ and “The Monk from Brooklyn.” He is also the host of the web TV show, “Martial Arts Odyssey,” which traces his ongoing journey through Asia, learning martial arts in various countries.

Warrior Odyssey, the book chronicling Antonio Graceffo’s first six years in Asia is available at amazon.com. The book contains stories about the war in Burma and the Shan State Army. The book is available at http://www.blackbeltmag.com/warrior_odyssey

See Antonio’s Destinations video series and find out about his column on  http://www.blackbeltmag.com

website

www.speakingadventure.com

Twitter

http://twitter.com/Brooklynmonk

facebook

Brooklyn Monk fan page

Brooklyn Monk on YOUTUBE

http://www.youtube.com/user/brooklynmonk1

 

Brooklyn Monk in 3D

Order the download at http://3dguy.tv/brooklyn-monk-in-3d/

Brooklyn Monk in Asia Podcast (anti-travel humor)

http://brooklynmonk.podomatic.com

Brooklyn Monk in Asia Podcast (anti-travel humor)

http://brooklynmonk.podomatic.com

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Martial Arts Odyssey: Bokator MMA Academy

In Uncategorized on August 8, 2013 at 12:07 am

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In 2013 the young fighters from the Bokator club in Phnom Penh, Cambodia, took Bokator to a new level, changing their name and title to Bokator MMA. Now, the fighters utilize a combination of traditional Bokator stand up techniques and modern jiujitsu and wrestling to fight professionally in both Bokator fights and MMA fights. Under the leadership of Bokator Kru Darith and MMA coach Chan Reach, Bokator has reached the 21st Century.

Watch: Martial Arts Odyssey: Bokator MMA Academy  (Part 1)

http://youtu.be/Ea7CEocC2YU

Watch: Martial Arts Odyssey: Bokator MMA Academy (Part 2)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uySQ4YyDihs

Brooklyn Monk, Antonio Graceffo is a martial arts and adventure author living in Asia. He is the author of the books, “Warrior Odyssey’ and “The Monk from Brooklyn.” He is also the host of the web TV show, “Martial Arts Odyssey,” which traces his ongoing journey through Asia, learning martial arts in various countries.

Warrior Odyssey, the book chronicling Antonio Graceffo’s first six years in Asia is available at amazon.com. The book contains stories about the war in Burma and the Shan State Army. The book is available at http://www.blackbeltmag.com/warrior_odyssey

See Antonio’s Destinations video series and find out about his column on  http://www.blackbeltmag.com

Email Antonio

Antonio@speakingadventure.com

website

www.speakingadventure.com

Twitter

http://twitter.com/Brooklynmonk

facebook

Brooklyn Monk fan page

Brooklyn Monk on YOUTUBE

http://www.youtube.com/user/brooklynmonk1

Brooklyn Monk in 3D

Order the download at http://3dguy.tv/brooklyn-monk-in-3d/

Brooklyn Monk in Asia Podcast (anti-travel humor)

http://brooklynmonk.podomatic.com

Brooklyn Monk in Asia Podcast (anti-travel humor)

http://brooklynmonk.podomatic.com

Antonio,Graceffo,brooklynmonk,monk,Brooklyn,martial,arts,odyssey,movies,MMA,mixed,traditional,Modern,wrestling,grappling,muay,thai,TV,show,sparring,san,shou,sparring,fighting,kicking,wrestle,wrestling,takedown,sweep,bokator,Cambodia,phnom,penh,khmer,boxing,chan,reach,darith,kru

Reaction to The Four Million Dollar Teacher

In Uncategorized on August 6, 2013 at 2:41 pm

“The $4 Million Teacher” is a great article that a friend shared with me about an innovative Hagwon teacher in Korea, who apparently makes 4 Million USD a year. Hagwans are the evening schools which Korean kids go to, sometimes until midnight, studying everything from math to English. Korea now has significantly passed the US in terms of literacy and university achievement. BUT please don’t let that statistic trick you into believing Korean schools are better. The kids are learning all of this stuff in hagwans and they typically attend hackwans from 3:00 or 4:00 PM till late evening five days a week, a full day on Saturday and sometimes half day on Sunday. Plus they have home teachers. So no, Korean education isn’t necessarily better, the kids just spend a lot more time studying and this is all private, paid for by parents, not the government. When I worked in a hackwan in Busan I asked my co-worker, if Korean schools are so good, why can’t they prepare the kids for the national exams?

The human cost of the Hackwan is that the Korean kids simply don’t have a childhood. The hackwans all run buses which pick the kids up at school and take them to the next hackwan. They shuffle back and forth like this, generally eating two or three meals a day outside the home. When they finally get home at 10:00 or 11:00 PM they have to do their school homework. My third and fourth grade students were telling me that they slept as little as five hours per night.

As for whether or not you should run to Korea to make money, the most money I have ever heard of a foreigner making in hackwans or private tutoring in Korea is $5,000 USD a month and the teacher in question was absolutely killing himself with hours of work, prep and travel. The highest paid teachers I have ever known in Korea and in Taiwan, which has a similar system called bushiban, were all local. They would teach exam prep in huge auditoriums and receive a salary based on the number of attendees. A very popular teacher could earn in a single Saturday what a foreign teacher earns for a month.

While the internet and particularly youtube is full of foreign teachers trying to make a name for themselves, I honestly don’t know if any of these are actually making money or if a Korean employer would even be interested in hearing your ideas for a new and innovative teaching method. What I saw in the many schools I worked at in Taiwan and, admittedly, only one in Korea, the schools had a method or a curriculum. They simply needed a white monkey to deliver the lesson, make the kids laugh, and not cause problems. And if you did that, you received your salary.

Brooklyn Monk, Antonio Graceffo is a martial arts and adventure author living in Asia. He is the author of the books, “Warrior Odyssey’ and “The Monk from Brooklyn.” He is also the host of the web TV show, “Martial Arts Odyssey,” which traces his ongoing journey through Asia, learning martial arts in various countries.

Warrior Odyssey, the book chronicling Antonio Graceffo’s first six years in Asia is available at amazon.com. The book contains stories about the war in Burma and the Shan State Army. The book is available at http://www.blackbeltmag.com/warrior_odyssey

See Antonio’s Destinations video series and find out about his column on  http://www.blackbeltmag.com

website

www.speakingadventure.com

Twitter

http://twitter.com/Brooklynmonk

facebook

Brooklyn Monk fan page

Brooklyn Monk on YOUTUBE

http://www.youtube.com/user/brooklynmonk1

 

Brooklyn Monk in 3D

Order the download at http://3dguy.tv/brooklyn-monk-in-3d/

Brooklyn Monk in Asia Podcast (anti-travel humor)

http://brooklynmonk.podomatic.com

Brooklyn Monk in Asia Podcast (anti-travel humor)

http://brooklynmonk.podomatic.com

 

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Dulling the Cutting Edge: Elmo Wants to Tickle You

In Uncategorized on August 6, 2013 at 12:43 am

When Mr. Hooper, one of the four or so, original human cast of Sesame Street, died, they actually included the death in an episode, to help children learn about and cope with people dying. He had a heart attack and his sphincter released, but I can’t remember if they showed that in the episode.

When Hurricane Katrina ravaged much of the US coast, Sesame Street did an episode where Big Bird’s nest got destroyed in a storm. It was another daring move and one that many critics and parents appreciated.

In the South African version of Sesame Street, they have “Kami is a furry yellow five-year-old HIVpositive girl muppet orphaned by AIDS who always has the sniffles.” As daring as that was, a friend of mine pointed out, “If they really wanted to be cutting edge, they would say how she got HIV.

Recently, the voice of Elmo was accused of befriending children on the internet, sending a limo to their home and then having sex with them. I think that would make a very disturbing Sesame episode, especially with that Elmo voice, saying “Come play with me.”

“Not enough liquor and therapy in the world to undo that.” Archer

San Da Test Shaolin Temple

In Uncategorized on August 5, 2013 at 1:10 am

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In 2013, Brooklyn Monk, Antonio Graceffo, returned to the Shaolin Temple, to study San Da, Chinese kickboxing. This video was his final exam, shot the night before he left the Temple, to return to Shanghai.

Watch: San Da Test Shaolin Temple

http://youtu.be/AE5370EN7hc

Brooklyn Monk, Antonio Graceffo is a martial arts and adventure author living in Asia. He is the author of the books, “Warrior Odyssey’ and “The Monk from Brooklyn.” He is also the host of the web TV show, “Martial Arts Odyssey,” which traces his ongoing journey through Asia, learning martial arts in various countries.

Warrior Odyssey, the book chronicling Antonio Graceffo’s first six years in Asia is available at amazon.com. The book contains stories about the war in Burma and the Shan State Army. The book is available at http://www.blackbeltmag.com/warrior_odyssey

See Antonio’s Destinations video series and find out about his column on  http://www.blackbeltmag.com

Email Antonio

Antonio@speakingadventure.com

website

www.speakingadventure.com

Twitter

http://twitter.com/Brooklynmonk

facebook

Brooklyn Monk fan page

Brooklyn Monk on YOUTUBE

http://www.youtube.com/user/brooklynmonk1

 

Brooklyn Monk in 3D

Order the download at http://3dguy.tv/brooklyn-monk-in-3d/

Brooklyn Monk in Asia Podcast (anti-travel humor)

http://brooklynmonk.podomatic.com

Brooklyn Monk in Asia Podcast (anti-travel humor)

http://brooklynmonk.podomatic.com

Antonio,Graceffo,brooklynmonk,monk,Brooklyn,shanghai,university,silc,Sydney,institute,technology,asia,china,shaolin,temple,kung,fu,san,da,kungfu,sanda,martial,arts,odyssey,movies,TV,show,sparring,san,shou,sparring,fighting,kicking,wrestle,wrestling,takedown,sweep, Shuāijiǎo,Chinese,china,henan,shaolin,temple,deng,feng,henan

Martial Arts Odyssey: Fighters Unite, Shanghai

In Uncategorized on August 5, 2013 at 1:03 am

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In Shanghai, China, Brooklyn Monk, Antonio Graceffo slowly begins the long, painful process of getting back into shape, after a one-year lay off from fighting. Coach Silas Maynard has created a gym in the heart of China’s biggest city where “normal people” and pros can train side by side.

Watch: Martial Arts Odyssey: Fighters Unite, Shanghai (Part 1)

http://youtu.be/hAO-zOlrJCg

Watch: Martial Arts Odyssey: Fighters Unite, Shanghai (Part 2)

http://youtu.be/97ZSaZXWeU8

Brooklyn Monk, Antonio Graceffo is a martial arts and adventure author living in Asia. He is the author of the books, “Warrior Odyssey’ and “The Monk from Brooklyn.” He is also the host of the web TV show, “Martial Arts Odyssey,” which traces his ongoing journey through Asia, learning martial arts in various countries.

Warrior Odyssey, the book chronicling Antonio Graceffo’s first six years in Asia is available at amazon.com. The book contains stories about the war in Burma and the Shan State Army. The book is available at http://www.blackbeltmag.com/warrior_odyssey

See Antonio’s Destinations video series and find out about his column on  http://www.blackbeltmag.com

Email Antonio

Antonio@speakingadventure.com

website

www.speakingadventure.com

Twitter

http://twitter.com/Brooklynmonk

facebook

Brooklyn Monk fan page

Brooklyn Monk on YOUTUBE

http://www.youtube.com/user/brooklynmonk1

Brooklyn Monk in 3D

Order the download at http://3dguy.tv/brooklyn-monk-in-3d/

Brooklyn Monk in Asia Podcast (anti-travel humor)

http://brooklynmonk.podomatic.com

Brooklyn Monk in Asia Podcast (anti-travel humor)

http://brooklynmonk.podomatic.com

Antonio,Graceffo,brooklynmonk,monk,Brooklyn,asia,china,shanghai,mma,mixed,martial,arts.odyssey,fighters,unite,silas,maynard,Sophia,Vinciguerra,training,gym,bjj,Brazilian,jiujitsu,boxing,san,da,muay,thai

Wearing my Bones around Your Neck

In Uncategorized on August 2, 2013 at 11:53 pm

By Antonio Graceffo

Fred bones

As of May 19, 2014, Fred Schroeder, a pilot from Shenzhen has agreed to fight me, but then pulled out 14 times. His latest pullout took less than four minutes. I guess with all that practice he got better at it. He talks big, though, telling me all the horrible things he will do to me after “Your laying their all bloody”. He even said he would pee on me, which I found very disturbing. But easily, the most idiotic thing he has said was:

“After I beat Antonio Graceffo, I am going to wear his bones around my neck.” Grandpa Fred Schroeder

Fred fight prince

I’m a little vague on this whole, beating me and wearing my bones around your neck thing. So, let’s break it down and walk through the steps. First, I assume you have to kill me in the ring for this to work. So, picture the fight night. I am dead, laying on the canvass. You receive your trophy, take some obligatory photos with the ring girls, and then, I guess, you lift my dead corpse onto your shoulder and carry it back to your dressing room. You prop me up against the wall, while you shower and change clothes. Then, you carry my body, which weighs 90kgs (remember you called me fat ass), out to the street and you hail a taxi. The taxi driver doesn’t notice or doesn’t care that you are transporting a dead body, and he brings you back to your hotel.
Next, you’re always bragging about how much richer you are than me, so I imagine this is a pretty nice hotel, the kind that doesn’t normally allow guests to carry corpses up to their rooms. So, you bribe the hotel manager, or make up a story about me being drunk, and you carry me into the lobby. Remember too, that when people die, their bowels release. So, you would be lugging this extremely heavy, dead body, which is leaking urine, poop, sweat and probably blood. But maybe you like that.
Do you just hoist me over a shoulder and get on the elevator or do you pay the bellhop to carry my body on one of those wheely carts? Up to you.
Finally, you get me back to the room and begin extracting my bones. Did you remember to bring your equipment and chemicals with you? Or, did you leave them in Shenzhen? If you left them, then you have to somehow get me onto an airplane, which would probably entail buying a ticket, or dismembering my corpse with a fire axe in the hotel, in which case, you can kiss your damage deposit goodbye.
Even if you were willing to endure these many, and often disgusting, steps given my bodyweight and the more than 30 years I spent training for fights, I would have to believe my bone density is much higher than that of other people and my bones would be extremely heavy and uncomfortable to wear around your neck.
After reviewing the steps, I can only surmise that you haven’t thought this one through. So, I am assuming this was more hot air on your part. Of course, if we go back to the beginning of this analysis, it is all predicated on you winning the fight. In order to win, you would have to show up. And I seriously doubt you will even get that far.
MMA fight! See Antonio “The Brooklyn Monk” Take on Grandpa Fred Schroeder in China
Brooklyn Monk, Antonio Graceffo is a martial arts and adventure author living in Asia. He is the author of the books, “Warrior Odyssey’ and “The Monk from Brooklyn.” He is also the host of the web TV show, “Martial Arts Odyssey,” which traces his ongoing journey through Asia, learning martial arts in various countries.
Warrior Odyssey, the book chronicling Antonio Graceffo’s first six years in Asia is available at amazon.com. The book contains stories about the war in Burma and the Shan State Army. The book is available at http://www.blackbeltmag.com/warrior_odyssey
See Antonio’s Destinations video series and find out about his column on http://www.blackbeltmag.com
website
http://www.speakingadventure.com
Twitter
http://twitter.com/Brooklynmonk
facebook
Brooklyn Monk fan page
Brooklyn Monk on YOUTUBE
http://www.youtube.com/user/brooklynmonk1

Brooklyn Monk in 3D
Order the download at http://3dguy.tv/brooklyn-monk-in-3d/
Brooklyn Monk in Asia Podcast (anti-travel humor)
http://brooklynmonk.podomatic.com
Brooklyn Monk in Asia Podcast (anti-travel humor)
http://brooklynmonk.podomatic.com